28 Jul

As I eat my ciabatta
And drink Charlie’s thirst quencher
(A fairly hipster lunch)
I ponder over my thoughts
Why I’m feeling this way
What’s happening
Where every part of me craves for you
Whom I often push away
When I get a little sad inside
How this isn’t how things are suppose
To turn out
And I play Undo by the 1975
Secretly hoping I hadn’t formed
Any sort of thing with you
Undoing all the knots that
Had created an emotional wreck
Of me
Tell me it’s normal
To feel protective
When all you did
Was plunged right into this life
And let fate bring us here



25 Jul

Oh take me away
The universe enveloping us both
Stars dusting our hair gently
Like glitter flecks on the cupcakes
I used to bake
Swinging on the white moon
Kissing on our backs
Tracking the tears with craters
Oh take me away
Where I would swim
In the galaxy and toss my legs
Up in the air
Where I cannot breathe
Not without your oxygen
We exist as one
Dreaming like Armstrong
Gravity like reality
Pulling us back down
I wish I could
Take me away
Place myself
In a whole other world

Guy best friend 101

23 Jul

I’ve always wanted a guy best friend be it gay or not but I’ve always thought of the endless situations when there is just that comfortable level of friendship. For example, as weird as it may sound,I want a friendship where I can just walk around half naked and know that nothing is going to be aroused or you get what I mean. Just so comfortable that we can both lie on the same bed and fall asleep and know that aint nothing going to happen that night. Okay,so maybe a few kisses shared would be okay,but that’s it. The imaginary line is drawn there. Isn’t it wonderful to not deal with girls so much and have a guy bff you can turn to? I think it is! It’s just a beautiful friendship that embodies everything and anything. The sad times when you can lie on his chest and cry and he’ll kiss your forehead and say “hey no worries.” Actually I think all that I’ve just said will only happen when I’m 20 and over probably not now. Not that I dont want to, I haven’t developed anything with anyone till that comfortable level.

Till then,

Don’t go?

22 Jul

Because I think I love you
And this day I’ve feared
For so long
No I don’t love you
Not that way
I just want you to stay
And not leave
So I can cry on your shoulders
For the first time
And kiss you
With drunkard lips
For the first time
Hug you for so long
I would never quite let go
I hope you aren’t fickle minded
Because then everything
Would just dissipate
Like the ashes
Burning in the furnace
This shouldn’t be how
I’m supposed to be feeling

Feeling the real blues

22 Jul

Monday is definitely bluesy. Currently having the flu with my lovely twin Zilin C and this morning we had the longest twinning moment texting each other! Also, my period just came (not that anyone needed to know) but I’ll be on an emotional roller coaster this week so every friend of mine please beware!! I mean,hey,I don’t want to lose anyone right? So there are certain things on my mind bothering me currently but I can’t say it here b/c of obvious reasons like (this is the Internet) but just to be vague like a fog, I want to create lasting friendships and not let it be broken down by some flirt???????????????? Okay that’s all. Till then,send me much love,


Pls ask!

Thank you!

19 Jul

Been thinking how wonderful 2013 has been and so I just want to list down all my blessings right here starting from the friends I have!


To Cheryl: You’re so so so cute and funky I just want to tell you that I love you so much and thank q for sitting just a table away from me! And in the middle of classes we just make stupid faces at each other and then laugh I enjoy that v v v much! I’m so sad that we only became closer this half of the year and not earlier but I really appreciate anything that we’ve had so far I love u Cheryl!


To Gaya3: Its been such a dope year with you I know we don’t exactly have a cuppa and talk HTHT but I really enjoy being around you b/c you always laugh at my silly jokes so I don’t know whether it’s meant to humor me or you really enjoy it hehe. Nevertheless,you are srsly always cheerful I wonder what gets you down mannnnn. Maybe nothing! Congrats on math improvement also! (So proud) so thank q for being thr always!!


To Ruth: whaaaaaatsup POA budz (along with Vern and Lynn) I still remember like in Ho’s POA class you said I gave you a six-pack and thereafter our friendship just fell into place and idek how!!! And thank youuuu so much for appreciating my poems (my love for you is more than Helga to Arnold) and creating a WordPress!! You are so cool and theoretically deep I’m just like “gurrrrrl I need to learn from the sensei” + your life with leaking onions/Woo is just Oscar worthy. Continue staying beautiful,sexy legs,and adieu! X


To my little cliquety-clique: I swore to myself in sec 3 I wouldn’t get into any clique at all and focus on my studies but guess what??? That didn’t happen because I met y’all (except for faith god-sistering since 2009) and to Zilin,you are the cutest little Asian girl who loves saying saranghaeyo and you are really pretty so stop saying u r fat la okay!! It’s just baby fat and thank you for letting me sing in class next to you. And buzzing about people. And things,really. And Carin, please ah,stop winking at me and abusing us!! Also, don’t PMS so much can?? But you’re still nice la and helpful at times + quite fun to be with when you are in a happy and non-abusive mood!! And faith,thanks for the tolerance towards me like seriously. I think by far you are the only that hasn’t uttered a single hate to me okay maybe in your brain you throw daggers at me but,still. And I know my mood fluctuates like the roller coaster at Six Flags but hey,I’m still funny right?? No. Thanks guys for making my 2012-2013 amazing and delightful and exciting everyday and I mean it.




To my London gurrrrls/wives: i thank God for the days on WA when we spaz about Race Imboden and the tumblr boys we see! + the BBQ where we swore to cook for the London boys. HAHAHAHHA you guys have made fencing enjoyable I mean the previous years were horrible b/c I was shy and rolypoly but now everything has changed!! I will never forget our baking/kids experience and I love all of you so deeply. Je’taime!




To the people I’ve met in my dg: (b/c I can’t say my entire dg per se) You guys are one of the coolest and nicest people I’ve met on earth and each of you have like a talent that is so unique (I mean like Isaiah,come on man,the deejaying is so dope) and to those I’ve grown closer to, I rly don’t know how y’all feel towards me so I’m just gonna assume its positive aaannnnnnd so I thank you for making this 1 year a memorable one and y’know even after we all separate,hopefully things won’t change. Actly,it probably will so what am I saying.

I think that’s about it for now!! This post is dreadfully long and to those friends I’ve missed out. No,you aren’t forgotten. It’s just that it takes me an awfully long time to find pictures! So till next time! x

Rhd 2013

19 Jul




Happy Racial Harmony Day everybody! Today is finally the day when you can look good in a sari or cheongsam or whatever! Ruth had pretty good sari tying skills as a Chinese!(so proud man so proud not that she needs my proudness for her) and I had a whale of a time taking pictures,being our last RHD as a whole!



Then some of us attempted to take a family portrait like the Addams family-esque. Did we pass?? Hope we did hahahahah had a lot of fun!




HHEHEHE gonna go ahead and do a friends dedication post b/c I think all of them are so lovely!!!!!❤❤💗